I came across a post on instagram that said: We’re Not Separate

“We’re Not Separate. The illusion of separateness is at the root of most suffering. Everything is interconnected—ecologically, energetically, emotionally. What we do to others, we do to ourselves.”

I’m definitely not immune to the scroll of social media, every now and then I come across one of those familiar therapy-style slideshows. You’ve probably seen them too. Some feel a bit off, others really land. Recently, I saw one that felt deeply aligned with something close to my heart: withness - the power of healing through connection.

It reminded me how easy it is to forget how deeply connected we really are… to each other, to nature, to the wider world. When life feels heavy or we’re going through something hard, it’s common to feel alone or separate. Sometimes we want to be alone or seperate in the depth of the feelings. But often, just a small pause can help us remember the threads that quietly hold us. A moment outside, tuning into the rustling leaves, the light on your skin, the sounds around you; all of it can gently bring us back to ourselves and to something bigger.

Even our smallest actions, the tone we take with ourselves, the way we show up with others, ripple outward. Have you noticed how different your day feels when you’re being hard on yourself, compared to when you meet yourself with a bit more gentleness?

Psychology and neuroscience both affirm what humans have always known: we are social beings. Wired for connection. Our emotional and even physical wellbeing is deeply shaped by the quality of our relationships. Historically, our survival depended on the safety of belonging and in many ways, it still does. When we show up with compassion, whether toward others or ourselves, we’re actually reinforcing that sense of safety, meaning and purpose. Our nervous systems respond. Our bodies soften.

The need to belong is not a luxury, it’s as essential as food and shelter. Remembering our interdependence doesn’t make us weak, it reminds us that we’re human. That we’re part of something larger. And that can be deeply comforting.

So I’m curious - how do you nourish real, emotionally supportive connection in your life? What helps you feel with others, and not alone?

Why healing through connection?

When I think about what truly helps us heal and grow, one thing stands out above the rest: connection. We’re wired for it. Whether it’s family, friends, or the wider communities we choose, feeling connected is like sunlight for our emotional well-being. It’s easy to underestimate just how powerful it is to be seen, heard, and accepted by others-but for me, it’s undeniably been the most restorative.

As with most people I have encountered, there have been times in my life when I felt isolated or misunderstood, and those feelings weighed heavily on me. In contrast, when I’m surrounded by people who genuinely care – who listen without judgment and celebrate my wins or support me through struggles – I feel lighter, more hopeful, and more centred and at home in my own skin. Relationships like this have been my anchors. Those loved ones remind me that I’m not alone, even (especially) when life gets tough.

But in today’s world, the idea of connection has become so complicated. Social media promises endless opportunities to connect, yet so often leaves us feeling more disconnected than ever. I’m not immune to it’s charms; we scroll, we like, we comment, but these quick interactions rarely satisfy our deeper need for genuine closeness. Think about being out and about, how often do you see people grab for their phones rather start up a conversation IRL? Research shows that as social media use rises, so do feelings of loneliness and isolation. These platforms foster a kind of “faux connection” (fonnection if you will) – a highlight reel of curated moments and instant validation that so often make us feel left out or worse, inadequate! The more time we spend online, the less time we devote to face-to-face relationships, which are essential for meaningful bonds.

Healing through connection isn’t just about having people around; it’s about the quality of those relationships. When we experience genuine acceptance and empathy, our bodies and minds begin to relax. We can let go of some of the tension we carry and start to trust again – both in ourselves and in others. I’ve noticed that even simple acts, like sharing a laugh, a meal, or a quiet moment, can help me calm my nervous system and open me to new possibilities of peace or joy or growth.

What’s truly special is how connection helps us rediscover our strengths. When someone listens to me, really listens, I feel valued and understood. That sense of being seen gives me the courage to keep moving forward, even when the path is uncertain. It’s a reminder that I matter, and that my experiences – good and bad – are part of a bigger human story.

I believe that healing doesn’t happen in isolation. We need each other. Our communities, however we define them, offer a space to practice kindness, patience, and forgiveness – not just for others, but for ourselves, too. Through connection, we learn to trust, to support, and to celebrate life together. And in doing so, we create a sense of belonging that helps us heal, grow, and thrive.

For me, being connected to my circles of influence is invaluable. It’s where I find strength, comfort, and inspiration. It’s where I feel most alive. And it’s why I believe, wholeheartedly, that healing through connection is not just possible – it’s essential. More than just a personal value for me – it’s at the heart of how I work as a therapist. My own journey has shown me how powerful it is to feel truly seen and heard and I know firsthand how much strength and comfort can come from feeling accepted. 

This belief directly informs my approach in the therapy room. I see the relationship between therapist and client as a partnership built on trust, empathy, and mutual respect – a safe space where you can show up as you are and feel valued for it. Research and experience both show that the quality of this therapeutic alliance is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in therapy, sometimes even more so than the specific techniques used. When you feel connected and understood, it becomes possible to explore difficult emotions, challenge old patterns, and build new, healthier ways of relating to yourself and others.

I strive to create an environment where you feel comfortable, respected, and genuinely listened to. This means working together, co-creating goals, and celebrating your progress along the way. I draw on my own appreciation for connection to foster a space where you can safely process your experiences, knowing you’re not alone in your journey. Ultimately, I believe that healing happens in relationship – both with others and within ourselves – and that by nurturing authentic connections in therapy, we lay the groundwork for developing a sense of belonging and healing connections in all aspects of your life. 

So I invite you to reflect on a time when you felt genuinely seen and heard by someone. How did that experience impact you, and what did it teach you about the power of connection?